It started when we went wedding dress shopping. She knew that my maximum budget was £ 1,500 but she brought in a lovely dress without telling me that it was over £ 4,000 and way beyond my budget. Of course I fell in love with it only to discover I couldn’t have it. She then did a similar thing with the venue, raving about a country house nearby and saying it was affordable, only for it to become clear when we went there that it was way beyond what my family could afford. Their family doesn’t have any more money than ours so I don’t know why she is doing this unless it is to make me feel bad. She is now saying that my husband-to-be and I won’t have a proper honeymoon unless we go somewhere exotic that is far beyond our means. I think all of this is spite for some reason, though I don’t know what I have done to upset her!
Wo says: Presumably what you did to upset her was to become the main woman in her brother’s life, forcing her into a secondary role. Some sisters immediately love their new family member, others do their best to resist change. It sounds as if you have the measure of her now, so you can prepare a defence. If she says you’d look good in something expensive then take one look and say it would suit her much better. If she wants you to go to a tropical island, say that it would suit someone sophisticated like herself better and you are just a simple soul. Sooner or later she will start to relax in your company and you’ll become good friends. That may be some time after the wedding though.