Letters to Wo

- what do you think?

I worry my boyfriend’s porn habit will explode once we are married and live together!

We are both living with our parents at home but soon we will be married and then living together in a small flat we are going to rent. He is already obsessed with porn on his phone and the only thing that stops him is being anywhere close to his mother who would kill him if she caught him. Once we have our own place he will have nothing to limit him and I already find it hard enough. How can I set limits so that my married life is bearable?


Wo says: Pornography can be a very destructive thing, and it can be an addiction as I suspect you already know. As with all addictions the addict can be completely in denial, unable to understand or admit that there is any problem. Clearly you need to find a way to set limits, if you can. For example you could explain that you find it unattractive to have sex with him if you know he has been viewing porn in the hours before, as you know he has images of other women in his mind. This might encourage him to start to separate the viewing of porn and making love to you in his mind. There are no easy answers to addiction though.

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