Letters to Wo

- what do you think?

What happens to our relationships with friends once we don’t go to the pub every day?

Our social lives are very much centred around our local pubs. We live in quite a large village and we tend to meet all of our friends in them. Most days we take our dog for a walk and then drop in to one or other of the pubs, and often do a mini pub crawl to see everyone. As we both have reasonable jobs we have been able to afford to do that, but now I am pregnant and so we plan to get married so that the baby has stability. We also need to start saving to buy a place rather than just renting. In short, going to the pub is going to have to be severely curtailed. That means that either we won’t see friends very often, or we are going to have to persuade them that popping in to have coffee with us at home is as much fun. I am not sure that all of them are up to having conversations while sober.


Wo says: There are real friends and then there are pub friends, and it sounds as if you are about to find out the difference between the two types. There is no escaping the fact that raising children and buying property are both very expensive things that leave little spare cash for socialising. Not to mention the fact that pub crawls tend to also mean lots of expensive takeaway meals and so on. You’ll have to be cooking at home once you start saving hard. For a lot of people getting married and having a child (in whichever order) mean a long period of living frugally and as a result losing contact with a lot of people who do not have such constraints. You will get through that period eventually, but there are really no short cuts. Your best friendships will survive it.

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